SHE WOULDN'T WANT THAT!

Submitted on 02/13/2018 by: Wicked
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a story by Charredtorso

I was sitting in my office at a mortuary in the San Fernando Valley of Los Angeles, minding my own business. There was a fire station 200 yards from the mortuary and every fire truck in a 5 mile radius was hauling ass to a house about 2 blocks from the Funeral Home. About an hour later, I got the call from the Coroner's office. A person had died in a house fire, they needed us to respond because they were too busy to get to the scene in the next few hours.

I enlisted the help of a retired minister, part-time staff member to help me. We jumped in the meat wagon and arrived at the house within 5 minutes. According to the Detective, Mom and Dad had their adult daughter and her two young kids living with them. The parents had gone shopping, so mom gave her kids $1 each and told them to go get an ice cream at the nearby liquor store.

With everyone gone, Daughter got a 5 gallon gas can out of the garage, locked herself in her room, doused herself with gasoline and lit her trusty Bic Lighter. The resulting fire turned Daughter into charred stumps, far from beyond being identifiable. The fire burned so quick and so hot, it sucked all of the oxygen up, resulting in the burning being limited to Daughter and the bed she was laying on.

The kids and their grand-parents arrived home with the entire street blocked with emergency vehicles. No one had a clue as to why this woman turned herself into a CHARREDTORSO. After I talked to the cops, I spoke briefly to the family and suggested they take some time and call me when they wanted to make funeral arrangements.

My co-worker and I took our cot and went inside. He took one look at what was left of the burned victim, turned and puked up his last 3 meals all over the hallway. I directed him out to our vehicle and conned a fire crew into helping me get the body on the cot and out of the house.

About two hours later, Mom, Dad and some other relatives walked into the Mortuary. They insisted that they wanted to view the body. I told them she was burned FAR beyond recognition and that even her sex could not be determined by her appearance. One of the male relatives said it was the LAW that they had to ID her. I asked what law he was referring to. He responded by calling ME stupid because I didn't know the law. (There is none) Finally, as a compromise, once again to avoid a room full of fainting screaming vomiting Hispanics, I allowed an Uncle to go back and see her. There were no facial features, they had all been burned away. Her arms were burned away from the elbows down as were her feet. The extreme heat that was generated by the fire caused her internal organs to partially burst out the front of her abdominal cavity. The Uncle surveyed the damage the fire had caused, turned and calmly walked with me back to the arrangement office. "No, we aren't going to see her..."

Then we got down to making funeral arrangements. After getting most of the vital statistics for the death certificate and some other paperwork. I asked the family what sort of arrangements they wanted to make. They told me that their daughter didn't work and had no money and that they were on a fixed income and could not afford "A big funeral."

I suggested that, in view of her condition and their financial situation they think about cremation. Mom bolted out of her chair. "OH GOD NO, SHE NEVER WOULD HAVE WANTED THAT." I nearly fell out of my chair and my retired minister part-time worker quit. A sad day for everyone.

TheBrig

02/14/2018 16:24

Hispanic chick set herself on fire?

Does that make her a refried beaner?

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grann
Wicked
Charredtorso

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evilirish1

02/14/2018 08:58

Nice

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COMMENT RATED BY:
Wicked

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StabbyTheClown

02/14/2018 06:46

It takes such a high heat to roast them like a pig like that.
Mmmmmm....
I mean gross, yeah gross.
Nice tale Charred!

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Wicked

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Get Zappad said :

02/14/2018

I prefer a slow cooker, so I don't get a charredtorso.

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Get Zappad

02/14/2018 05:16

Charming logic.

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COMMENT RATED BY:
StabbyTheClown
Wicked

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Kaboshski

02/14/2018 03:52

CHARREDTORSO! another fantastic episode! You Rock!

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UKChrissie
StabbyTheClown
Wicked

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necron

02/14/2018 00:32

Excellent, One less Aztec parasite on the state bill

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StabbyTheClown
Wicked

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dastiffy

02/13/2018 22:43






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necron
UKChrissie
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Wicked
Charredtorso

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