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NOBODY WANTS MY JOB
I stopped by my mother's house one afternoon. I had picked up a body at a nearby hospital and hadn't seen her for a few weeks. She had a Plumber just finishing up some work at her house, so out of curiosity, I picked up his bill. After I was able to close my mouth and my eyes rolled back where they belonged , I observed: "Damn, I am in the wrong business. You are knocking down some serious cash."
He looked at me with contempt in his sewer shark eyes. "I have the dirtiest job in the world." "No one wants to do what I do." "That's why I make decent money.
I paused for a moment. "Have you ever carried a decomposed body down 3 flights of stairs and had the huge blisters burst on you?" "Have you ever scraped brains and bone of a 16 year old kid that blew his own head off, off the wall and ceiling to quiet his mother?" "Have you ever had to take a dead newborn baby out of the arms of it's mother?" "How many bodies have you pulled out of water after they have been floating for a week?" "How many suits or dress shirts have you ruined at work?"
"What's the largest number of bodies you have Embalmed from one wreck in a single night?"
The plumber stuttered and stammered for a few moments. "I've never done anything like that...." "I am a Mortician." "I do that sort of thing all of the time.....FOR ABOUT A THIRD OF THE MONEY YOU GET." "Don't fucking try to tell me YOU have the dirtiest job in the world." I thought I had goaded him into puking at one point. But he managed to get my mother's check and stagger out to his van.
Nice videos-especially these chinese mistresses stripped and humiliated.Would like to post in kaotic too-and i really have what to post in topic-anyway here needs credits etc, i am not allowed:(
I had translated the 'Delviz' clips that were in the Que, but I was not sure if you wanted to release them yet so I had left them there. Cheeri..
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I transferred from a "sleepy hollow" community in the San Gabriel Valley of Los Angeles County, to
the "Rock 'em Sock 'em" Ghettos of South Central L.A. County at the age of 43. 43 is the age where most cops are thinking of retiring in a few years and are looking for a place to hide, without getting sued, fired or shot. At that point in time, I had been a police officer for just over 3 years. Going from "sleepy hollow" to the Ghetto, was like going from a Cub Scout Troop to a SEAL Team. If you didn't bring your "A" game, bad things could happen and often did.
I started in the Ghetto in December and as a new officer, I caught all of the weekends and holidays. I had no problem with that. After a few weeks in "Da Hood" I was becoming an adrenaline junkie. I had been with the department for just a few weeks when I was required to work New Years Eve. At about 11:30 pm on December 31st, we drove our patrol vehicles to the 3rd floor of a 4 floor concrete parking structure, because of all the gun fire celebrating the new year. Flights landing at the Los Angeles Airport were always diverted to coming in over the ocean, to avoid getting shot up.
Everyone working that night was in good spirits. We were safe from falling lead and happily munching pizza and drinking soft drinks. Only the highest priority calls would get a response until about 12:30, when MOST of the shooting stopped. At about 11:50, several units were dispatched to a loud party call, involving numerous people shooting various weapons into the air. We slid up to the party house about 3 minutes later, it sounded like a pistol range.
About 8 cops walked into a large back yard at the residence and encountered several VERY drunk Mexicans brandishing handguns, shotguns and rifles. Everyone started yelling in Spanish and English "DROP THE GUNS". Despite being drunk, 99% weren't stupid and the weapons landed on the concrete patio or the grass. When we thought we were in control, an explosion from a shotgun went off.
Standing off, by himself was a very fat and very drunk Mexican. All 8 cops had their guns pointed at lard boy. Everyone, including his fellow party goers, were yelling at him to drop the shotgun. In a case of terminal stupidity, Julio looked a the gaggle of cops and our guns. "Eeeeees OK, eeeeees ok"
and began to level his scatter gun at us. None of us waited for Julio to pull the trigger. WE pulled the trigger. Julio was DRT (Dead Right There). In an instant he gained half a pound with all the HYDRA SHOCK projectiles in his body. There was an eerie silence, only the jets coming into the airport could be heard. The smell of gun powder lingered in the air, along with a bloody mist.
A woman's shrill cry broke the silence. "IIIiiiiieeeeee, ju shot heeeeem." What followed was an incredibly violent brawl, involving 8 cops and 30 or so pissed off drunks. While we batoned, pepper sprayed and beat the attacking Aztec warriors., some one put out an OFFICER NEEDS HELP call. The rest of our department, LAPD, LA Sheriff's and another PD arrived in force. We arrested about 15 people, several of whom had to visit the hospital first. We had two officers with mild injuries.
Between arrest reports, officer involved shooting reports and interviews from 3 agencies, I didn't leave the station until almost noon. I had just enough time to drive home, shower, eat and drive the hour commute back to the ghetto for another 10 hour shift at 3 pm. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Another perfect illustration!
Your baseball bat information
was one of the funniest things
I have read in here.